Lost in Translation
by Captain Meredith Pond
Summary: The intrepid Captain Janeway comes to face what has happened in the seven years she and her crew were lost in the Delta Quadrant. Chakotay has a well kept secret. Endgame was never really the end, was it?
1. Chapter 1

She'd done it. She, Kathryn Janeway, had done the impossible and gotten them home. But as she stood staring out into the familiar quadrant she's longed to find for so many years, she begins to wonder at what cost. Looking around her she's glad to see the smiling faces of her crew, no- her family, staring back at her.

She couldn't have done with without every one of them, and at this moment she knows that she should feel overwhelming joy to have survived this impossible trek and returned, but as she looks at the beaming faces of her crew, she notices the one person's face she longs to see the most is turned towards another. Her heart sinks with the realization that she's too late, what the Admiral had predicted had already come to fruition. She sees Seven gazing lovingly into Chakotay's eyes. She would have liked to have seen Chakotay, to study his face to see if, after seven years of avoidance and determination, she still holds any piece of his heart, but her eyes are blinded by tears as the Admiral's words echo in her head. "Chakotay and Seven", she wonders to herself.

Kathryn turned to Harry, fighting to keep a tight control over the captain's mask she has so meticulously maintained through this journey, "Commander, I'll be in my ready room. You have the bridge. Try not to let us get lost again." she commanded with a regretful laugh before fleeing the bridge.

* * *

Sitting in her quarters that night, she was finally able to reflect on the past 48 hours. He future self and appeared out of nowhere to try to save her crew. But Kathryn had a sneaking suspicion that the Admiral had an alternative motive, but it appeared it was still too late. Chakotay had moved on and found happiness in the arms of the blonde 'bombshell' of a borg. She had always thought she would be happy for him in Chakotay had decided to add himself to the 'pairing off' that had seemed to slowly occur over the past seven years, yet for some reason she was deeply saddened by the recent turn of events between her Borg friend and steadfast First Officer.

Trying to ignore the vice-like grip that his happiness seemed to have on her heart, Kathryn decided it was best to try and condense as much information as possible to have available to present to the Federation first thing tomorrow. Even though Voyager was still several days away from Earth, she knew that there would be several meetings in person and over comm before official celebrations could be held to welcome the long lost crew.

As she sat at her desk and went over the countless logs, data reports, and trade negotiations from the past seven years, emotions that she had kept in check for so long came flooding back. Here was the very first log from the day she had set off to capture the rogue Marquis ship, the day Naomi Wildman was born, the day Kes sacrificed herself for the crew had become more like her family, the countless near-death (or death in some cases) experiences, and tucked away, hidden deep in the hundreds of reports on file she found one titled New Earth. She gasp when she realized that this was the log she had written upon returning to the ship. Opening the file, tears fell unbidden as she recalled their initial stranding, Chakotay's joy at surprising her with that wonderful tub, the night of the Angry Warrior story, and finally that fateful comm from Tuvok declaring that he was on his was to save them from their gradual domestication. She had hated herself in that moment for being sad that she was about to be ripped from their tiny Eden and back into the real world, but she was the captain. Sacrifices must be made.


	2. Chapter 2

Chakotay couldn't believe it. This crazy, suicidal plan had actually worked. They had made it back to the Alpha Quadrant. He's never been so happy to see a Starfleet admiral in his entirely life, and he had a sneaking suspicion he would never be as happy to see one ever again. He was so dumbfounded that he barely heard Kathryn had over control and rush off the bridge. Shaking himself back to reality he instructed the crew to continue their current path toward home, before handing over control to Tuvok and rushing off for a much needed time of reflection.

Retreating to the solitude of his own quarters he pondered the drastic changes he had experienced in the past 48 hours. The Admiral had arrived, he had learned that in an alternate timeline things had not gone at all as he had planned, and now he was back in his native quadrant with the threat of criminal charges still looming overhead.

Shaking his head, he sat down at his desk to comm Sekaya. He was sure his sister would already have learned of his safe return, but he suddenly had more issues which seem just as urgent as getting home had mere hours ago. Pulling up his contacts, she answered almost instantaneously. "Brother!", she cried as she wiped the tears falling down her cheeks. "It's so nice to finally be back!", he replied, his own tears also falling.

They talked for hours, of things he had seen and witnessed, and of what he expected to happen to he and his former crewmen. After stories were shared and worries assuaged, Sekaya frowned. Giving him an inquisitive look that Chakotay meant nothing good, she drastically changed the conversation. "As lovely as it has been to talk to you brother, I feel that there is something weighing heavily on your mind."

Chakotay knew there was no way he would be able to hide his current struggle from his sister, so instead he began to relate the story from the beginning. He walked Sekaya through every aspect of the past seven years. From his capture and the loss of his vessel, to being stranded on New Earth, to Seven's straightforward advances, and finally the last 48 hours of pure chaos and nerves. Sekaya sat, intently listening to every word of the tale until he reached the point of Seven's romantic advances. Upon hearing this, her features darkened and she seemed distressed at her brothers actions of the past several weeks.

"Brother, you're telling me that you've chosen to betray your vow to your captain in the stead of a romance with a half robotic, blonde, who- from what I've gathered from this story- has the maturity level of a middle schooler? Have you gone insane? For seven years your letters have contained nothing more than glowing descriptions of your captain and occasional updates on yourself and B'elanna; yet, weeks before you return home you decide to turn your back to pursue a relationship with a child?"

Chakotay sat in utter silence. How could he explain that he had never intended for his relationship with Seven to be anything romantic. He had wanted to be her mentor, her guide. But with each passing date it was harder to say no to someone who was obviously interested in you. Eventually he would have to come to terms with the fact that there would always be 'parameters' with Kathryn, so why not distract himself by helping the former Borg in the meantime. If he was being honest with himself he had never expected this "relationship" with Seven to last much longer anyway. He was growing tired of the Borg's constant bumblings and dating mishaps that had only become more and more obvious with each passing date.

He had always thought the relationship would die off naturally, but then the Admiral had appeared and everything was different. The night of her arrival she had approach Chakotay in private, confronted him with the facts of her reality. She berated him for being so weak as to fall for the younger, prettier woman. All he could do was sit in shock listening to her relate how hard it had been to watch him drift away into the arms of another, even if they had never really been together.

Shaken, he had slowly walked up to her from where she sat at his desk, much the picture of his Kathryn, the one he cared for so dearly. He tried to explain to the best of his abilities what he had intended, and apologized, saying that he could never foresee that happening in this current timeline. Amazingly the Admiral's eyes softened, she had forgiven him but warned that her younger self would need time to accept what he was claiming. The Admiral had confessed to using Chakotay's future to try to spur her younger self into action, but to no avail. But if all succeeded maybe they would both have a chance at happiness again.

He sat in his quarters for hours that night, attempting to process what she had told him. Now all that would be different. Things would end with Seven like he expected. He had no reason to move on because Kathryn still cared for him, the Admiral had as much and admitted it while explaining her tactics. All that was left was to explain to Kathryn and apologizing for everything he had ever done. None of the past would matter if she would take him back. If not as a lover then at least as a friend.

That night he had convinced himself that his feeling would have to wait until they had succeeded. Well, they had done it, and as he said his goodbyes to Sekaya, he realized that there was nothing keeping him from admitting his feelings now. Standing from his console he determined that he had to find Kathryn. Too much time had been wasted to spend any more of it dancing around the truth.

* * *

Kathryn startled at the ring of her door. Wiping her eyes and checking her reflection in the mirror, she turned to the door and called for her visitor to enter. She was shocked to see Chakotay's silhouette standing in her doorway. He strode toward her and took her hands in his. She could just see a sea of emotions swimming in his dark eyes, lit only by the passing stars and the distant glow of their home sun. Leader her to her couch he turned to marvel at the magnificence of the planet they had finally reached and stopped for a moment to consider all they had sacrificed to get back. Turning back to her, Chakotay to see the clear look of concern in her eyes. He realized that he had yet to say anything and quickly cleared his throat, becoming surprisingly nervous unlike any fear he had felt before. Somehow this magnificent creature sitting beside him had the ability to strike more fear into him than even the strongest Borg queen.

"I once told you a story of an Angry Warrior… Do you remember that?", he ask, letting his mind slip back to the last time he had been this nervous. She had come into the kitchen area of their little house, with an obvious speech already prepared, knowing exactly how she wanted to handle this situation. But had had quickly put a stop to that, and he hoped that his story could once again break down any of the walls she had built around her heart to keep herself safe from him.

Her gaze hardened at the mention, "Of course I do, and I think I know where you are going with this… But you've obviously moved on. I'm happy for you and Seven. You both deserve whatever happiness you can have after such trying times before."

Chakotay looked at her dumbfounded, "I think you've misunderstood my intentions with Seven. Yes, we've been going on dates, but they're for her social lessons. She needed a male counterpart and decided that I was the best fit. She obviously can't pick up on social hints or she would have known that the Doctor is in love with her… and that I'm in love with someone else. Which is exactly what I told her an hour ago when I helped her find her aunt back on Earth. I explained that, while I hoped that she would find happiness with someone in the future, that person could not be me. I could never been happy on Earth or on any other planet or in any other galaxy without-"

"Don't say it. Not yet… Chakotay there are still problems. It's best if neither of us admits anything just yet. Let me make sure that you and your crew and are safe and that all of my demands are met before we broach any interpersonal problems. It would be best if Starfleet were under the impression that I followed protocol on at least one aspect. But, maybe after Starfleet is pleased with our professional performance, maybe we can readdress those parameters?" Her eyes glistened, fighting back the tears that threatened to fall as she once again had to push him away. But this time, there seemed to be hope. The slightest glimmer of hope that, once everyone was safe, once she had done her job and gotten everyone back and settled, that they could once again revisit their own problems.


End file.
